When should we use the words “I have to” and “I want to”


For many years in every morning at 10 o’clock sharp, a business woman had visited her mother in a nursing home. They were very close and she loved her very much. Sometimes she had business meetings in that time of day (10 o’clock) and her answer was always the same: “I can not, I have to visit my mother.”

Then her mother died. Shortly afterward, someone had asked the woman for a meeting at 10 o’clock. Suddenly realized that she could no longer visit her mother. And her next thought was: Oh, if I could visit my mother once again.” From that moment I have to became I want to.
Pleasant things in life are the ones we want to do. “Today I want to go to theater” or “I want to go on vacation next week.” Things that are burdening us are the ones that need to be done. “Tomorrow I have to wake up at 6:30 to go to work” or I have to clean up the house.”

Because perceptions hinder our thoughts and actions, try replacing I have to with I want to. Instead of saying I have to go to work“, think of those that don’t have a job and you can say with enthusiasm Tomorrow I want to go to work.” Instead of saying I have to clean up“, think about how your home looks when it’s clean and then you can easily say I want to clean up.” In time it will be easier to use I want to.

It’s amazing what a change of attitude occurs simply because of using words that do not involve constraint or obligation. You will see that by using this exercise  things that need to be done will become more simple and easy.


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